A lack of healthy coping mechanisms is often at the heart of mental health problems. Coping mechanisms are the strategies we instinctively use to regulate difficult emotions. Someone who has developed unhealthy coping mechanisms find themselves being worn down by tough times, even if they seem to manage in the moment.
The good news is that, although instinctive coping mechanisms develop during childhood, it is possible to replace unhealthy responses with effective ones. It will take time before the healthy coping mechanisms become habit, but with practice they can replace the strategies that just aren’t working.
Unhealthy coping mechanisms include things like avoidance, substance use, and hyperreactivity. The following coping mechanisms are far more effective, both in the short-term and the long-term.
1. Mindfulness Practice (Non-Reactivity)
Mindfulness comes up a lot in discussions about mental health these days. The mindful approach helps people cope with stress, anxiety, depression, and many more difficulties. But what are the practices that can become effective coping mechanisms?
Most people think of breathing methods and meditation as the primary mindfulness strategies for getting through tough moments. However, while they are crucial and effective, it is the mindfulness principle of non-reactivity which we aim towards.
This refers to the habit of pausing when a difficult thought or feeling arises. Instead of following the instincts which are no longer helpful, you pause before reacting, giving you the chance to approach the situation differently.
2. Productive Physical Activity
When facing difficult thoughts or feelings, it is often useful to ‘get out of your head’. This does not mean stuffing things down, but rather using a coping mechanism that doesn’t require you to change your thought patterns in the moment.
Physical activity can be perfect for this purpose. This can include things like running, cycling, yoga, or even walking.
3. Journaling for Emotional Expression
Journaling is a simple yet powerful way to process emotions and gain self-awareness. Writing down your thoughts and feelings in the moment can help clarify what’s troubling you, uncover patterns in your mood, and identify triggers. Practicing journaling for ten minutes a day will make it easier to do it as a coping mechanism in the moment.
4. Call Someone
Humans are inherently social beings, and having supportive relationships can buffer stress, reduce feelings of isolation, and improve overall well-being. When you are struggling with a situation or a feeling, their presence in your life gives you the option to call for support. This isn’t about rushing to your aid, but rather about lending you an ear. Rather than keeping your feelings bottled up, you can express them without judgment.
5. Self-Compassion
Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a loved one. Instead of berating yourself for mistakes, self-compassion is about acknowledging your imperfections with gentleness and forgiveness. You can learn to reframe negative self-talk, replacing harsh judgments with affirming statements. For example, instead of saying, “I’m a failure,” try, “I’m doing my best, and that’s enough.” Self-compassion also involves recognizing that struggles are a shared human experience; you’re not alone in your challenges. When you practice self-compassion, you create a nurturing mental environment that supports healing and personal growth.
It requires practice to break down the messaging you’ve been listening to all your life. Once you start, however, it is truly transformative.
6. Creative Outlets
Creativity is a powerful way to process emotions, release tension, and find joy. Activities like painting, playing an instrument, writing, or crafting provide a healthy distraction and an emotional outlet. They allow you to channel your feelings into something tangible, helping to externalize and manage inner turmoil. You don’t need to be an expert – it’s about the process rather than any product. Experiment with different mediums until you find what resonates with you, so that you’re ready to turn to these activities in difficult moments.
7. Limit Stressful Triggers
Stressful triggers, such as constant exposure to negative news, social media pressures, or toxic environments, can worsen mental health. Unfortunately, social media has become a distraction that people turn to when feeling down. This leads to a cycle in which one’s difficult feelings are amplified, leading to even further consumption of stressful content.
8. Identify Positive Distractions
Of course, we all need distractions sometimes. When used responsibly, distractions can be an excellent way of dealing with feelings that are too intense to regulate in other ways. Because some distractions make things worse, it is crucial to identify positive distractions beforehand. What do you enjoy doing that actually takes your mind off things?
These distractions will differ for every person. You may love reading and getting swept up by a story, but for someone else an easy movie is more appropriate. You can also use the strategy of calling a friend for a distraction sometimes, chatting with them about other matters instead of talking the issue through.
9. Gratitude
It is quite common for people who struggle with emotional regulation to focus on the negatives. This is in itself a coping mechanism – they look for everything that is wrong as a way of preparing for the worst case scenario. However, this is not usually effective, as it is impossible to control everything around you.
Practicing gratitude is a great way to counter this. It’s about looking for things you appreciate in your life and expressing gratitude either internally or to a person.
10. Ground Yourself in Nature
It may seem counterintuitive, but the best way of regulating your difficult emotions is to experience the moment more fully. Generally, we try to do the opposite in an attempt to escape the emotion. However, while feelings come and go when you experience them, avoiding them keeps them around.
Grounding yourself in nature is a good way of experiencing your emotions without being overwhelmed by them. You are learning to be present with the appreciation of life around you and in the process you let the feelings wash over you like a wave.
Conclusion
If you haven’t developed healthy coping mechanisms, the good news is that you can change how you react. The above 10 effective coping mechanisms will help you get through difficult situations that would otherwise threaten to overwhelm you.
When your emotions are particularly intense, it is important to get professional help, no matter how effective your usual coping mechanisms may be. Don’t hesitate to pick up the phone and call a mental health professional, or your local hospital or hotline when necessary.
