Addiction takes a heavy toll on the individual, but its impact goes much further. The family of the addict is almost always affected by their problem. It is therefore crucial that family members of addicts learn self-care strategies both before and during the process of recovery.
You may have heard addiction referred to as a ‘family disease.’ This is not just because the family empathizes with their loved one. It is also due to the emotional, physical, social, and financial toll it takes.
Children of addicts suffer more than adult family members. A SAMHSA study showed that 1 in 8 American children lived in a household with an adult suffering from addiction. As such, the importance of self-care for the family cannot be understated.
To get a clearer idea of which self-care strategies might work, it is necessary to understand the ways addiction affects the family.
How Does Addiction Affect the Addict’s Family?
Emotional Toll
Seeing a family member struggle with addiction can take a heavy emotional toll on the family. The person may feel intense sadness and anxiety for their loved one. These emotions persist over an extended period of time and their impact builds.
It can be extremely stressful to have a family member with addiction. The person may be at risk of overdose. They may harm themselves in other ways with reckless and even criminal behavior. There may be times they go missing, leaving the family to fear for their lives.
Furthermore, family members of addicts often feel tremendous guilt, believing that the addiction is somehow their fault or that they should have done more to prevent it.
This may all lead to broader emotional problems, including depression and anxiety disorders.
Financial Toll
It’s not just the family’s emotional wellbeing that suffers. Addiction can become a very expensive illness. The addict may use up the family’s funds to buy substances instead of basic necessities. They may lose their job, which can cause major financial issues even if they are not the primary breadwinner.
Addicts may even resort to stealing from family members when they do not have enough money of their own to buy substances. In some cases, they do this through lies and manipulation, asking to borrow for a basic necessity and using guilt to get the person to agree.
There may also be financial costs involved in getting the person out of tricky situations, including things like legal expenses or paying for damage they’ve done to others.
Physical Toll
The above issues can lead to a physical toll on the family members. Stress can cause significant health issues over an extended period of time, including fatigue, insomnia, and even heart disease.
Since they are putting the addict’s health needs above their own, they may neglect to see a doctor when necessary or to eat well and exercise.
Which Self-Care Strategies Work for Families of Addicts?
Because the ways in which addiction affects the family are varied, self-care strategies need to address all areas of their lives.
Setting Boundaries
Families of addicts often struggle to set boundaries. As such, the addict’s problems become everyone’s problems. The foundation of self-care comes in setting boundaries.
Boundaries essentially delineate which behaviors you will accept and which you won’t. Examples of helpful boundaries are:
- Not engaging in petty arguments
- Refusing to have discussions with the person while they are under the influence
- Paying for basic necessities in person rather than giving money to the addict to do so
- Setting and enforcing consequences for bad behavior
- Setting aside time each day during which they are not allowed to disturb you so as to take care of your own needs
Seeking Professional Help
While your loved one may seem to need professional help more urgently than you do, that does not mean you should forgo your own needs. Addiction causes dysfunction in families and, even if you’re doing well now, you may struggle in the future. Individual therapy offers a private space to process emotions, develop coping strategies, and gain insights into personal experiences and reactions.
Support groups offer an additional layer of support. These groups bring together people who share similar experiences, allowing members to learn from one another and find solace in shared understanding. This can also help you feel less alone.
Maintaining Your Physical Health
When you feel overwhelmed, it is easy to let your physical health go. It may not seem so important to eat well and work out right now. However, the better your physical health is, the better your mental health and ability to cope with stress will be.
Consider activities such as walking, running, or yoga, which can reduce stress hormones and increase endorphins, improving mood and energy levels.
Try to keep a balanced diet as well. Nutrient-rich foods will help to keep your energy levels stable and support overall physical and mental health. Ensure your diet includes plenty of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins.
Mindfulness & Meditation
In addition to therapy and support groups, mindfulness and meditation are effective techniques for managing stress and anxiety. Deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided meditation can help you stay grounded and calm in the face of stress. These practices can also improve your ability to cope with difficult emotions and maintain emotional balance.
Engaging in Hobbies
Don’t forget that your hobbies and interests are important. They bring joy and relaxation which is vital for emotional well-being. Whether it’s reading, gardening, painting, or playing a musical instrument, these activities can provide a much-needed break from stress and offer a sense of accomplishment and pleasure.
Building a Support Network
Having a strong support network is crucial for navigating the challenges of supporting an addict. Close family and friends can provide emotional support, practical assistance, and a listening ear. Don’t hesitate to reach out to them when you need help or just need someone to talk to.
Many communities also offer resources like counseling services, support groups, and educational workshops.
Conclusion
Self-care is extremely important for the families of addicts. While you may feel more concerned about your loved one, you cannot help them unless you are in a good emotional and physical state. The above strategies will help you live a sustainable lifestyle during this difficult time.