Name: Mariah Bruce
From: Bakersfield, CA
Stuggles of Witnessing Addiction
Struggles of Witnessing Addiction Mariah Bruce
Uncovering the dark insights of addiction can be frightening. As many people may relate addiction to those individuals who mindlessly wonder the streets as they are talk to some mysterious imaginary entity that only they can see. Others may relate it to drinking a little too much alcohol and allowing a certain emotion whether it be anger, or sadness to overtake them for the night. The definition would see it as simple as “the fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity”. I think of addiction and see my mother. I see my mother who obscures herself in drugs, alcohol, and men to hide the secrets and pain that has overtaken the beautiful, strong, and sober women who once was.
When I was a child, I had a mother who was selfless, undeniably the smartest person I knew, a law enforcement dispatcher supervisor, a cancer survivor, loved her children more than words could describe, and would never miss out on her children’s events whether big or small. We had everything we needed because of the determination of hard working parents. Currently, that type of mother is gone. Did addiction kill that person and she would never come back? Did addiction allow her to forget us? Did addiction allow that person to become lost and unable to find her way back? When I was a teenager my mother allowed addiction to become who she was. As me and my brother soon found our home to be motherless and up for foreclosure.
The consequences brought a life full of anger, hurt, confusion, rash decisions, and determination to overcome and persevere through the obstacles that my mother left me (as the older sibling) to deal with. I had to rush into adulthood while in my young teenage years and take the adult role for my younger siblings. To think my mother had so much cause and effects to small incidents in our lives such as making my young brother run drugs to and from for her, and to make us unknowingly hide drugs for her from other people as they came to us, looking for her. Seeing the scars and the dark bruises around her eyes as she had just gotten beaten, seeing her almost drown herself because the alcohol took over her body, seeing the men take advantage of her while she blacked out, knowing the countless times I had to carry her on my back cause she could not walk out of the dark unknown bars she would attend, seeing drugs and flushing them down the toilet as she was passed out was a daily chore.
As an adult now, I have begun my 6th year as a correctional officer and my brother went off to a four-year college on a football scholarship. Even though the emotional incidents have left scars on my brother and I through all we have witnessed at a young age. We were determined to eventually grow wise and make decisions for ourselves. I have offered help to my mother, once giving her a place to stay and money to keep her afloat with minor expenses. Which only lead to stealing from me and abusing the help that was offered. Drugs can hide the emotional bruises but also uncovers the ugly truth.
As the nation continues to undergo plentiful amount of individuals who are battling addictions to mask the pain, the hurt, the mental instability one may be going through. It can be a selfish act to only consider yourself. As a mother, sister, father, brother, uncle, aunt, son, daughter, cousin, friend, or loved one it is important to consider those around you and the effects it might bring to those individuals if you find your way towards alcohol and/or drugs. The nation is under attack of rapid growth in addiction which can all start by one prescription given by the doctor. As some prescriptions are prescribed to “ease the pain” for those with addictive natures can be abused to always want to ease the pain whether it be emotionally, physically, mentally. We all the traumas of life to ease so drugs and abuse of drugs prescribed by our doctors are abused and keep our bodies wanting more release. Doctors main objective is to make us “feel” better; therefore, they prescribe drugs to get paid, make us feel better and their job is done. In order to remedy this problem is to have doctors who not just want us to feel better and shove drugs in our faces, but to make sure we are mentally and emotionally stable enough to handle the drugs that are prescribed. Instead, psychologists and therapist should also be a prescribed for certain individuals and should be noticed by a doctor if this is needed or if a history or family history of medications have been abused.